Deal with Insults by Nitaai Meditation
Nitaai Meditation keeps us always in touch with our inner nature. So we can immediately understand the intentions of insult and react in an appropriate way without hurting one’s self-esteem or emotions.
Insults can be of various kinds which include physical, verbal, direct, indirect etc. Most of the time they are verbal which is directed to one’s self esteem. Indirect verbal insults are jokes with puns and ironic statements, imitating with stress on the flaws, and false praise. There are insults of commission and insults of omission.
Insults of Commission
This sort of insult involves actions. Facial expressions are exaggerated with additions of cold stares, a false smile, or a raised eyebrow is also counted as indirect verbal insults.
Insults of Omission
These types of insults include exclusion of the concerned person. These are equally common if not more. Here insults include not inviting or including someone, ignoring, not answering phone calls, not responding to friendly gestures, including basic eye contact, sending messages through people of lower category in status or age.
People either react or respond to such insults in various ways. So, what are the ways people deal with all these insults?
This response is experienced due to various reasons: 1) the person has taken the insult and the insulted too seriously, 2) There is truth in the insult, 3) the insult has hurt or upset the concerned person. This will lead to further insult.
This is a very weak way to respond and shows very low self esteem of the concerned person.
This form of response shows a very strong character of the concerned person. In spite of the damage done to his ego and self worth the person has kept the relation on a higher pedestal. It takes a lot of courage and grit to display such a response. This may seem like a very weak response, but in many cases is actually the strongest response of all.
There would have been better ways to express disinterest or disregard rather than an insult of omission or insult of commission. This response comes mostly from a matured person. The concerned person takes it as a statement of truth and it is mostly when a best friend is involved. It is accepted as potential stepping stone even if is painful.
In general, if you respect the person who insulted you, you ought to give thought to the insult and learn as much as you can from it. On the other hand, if you think that the person who insulted you is unworthy of your consideration, you have no reason to take offense, just as you have no reason to take offense at a naughty child or a barking dog. So whatever the case, you have no reason to take offense.
3. Returning the insult
This kind of response is called a put-down. There are several problems with the put-down, even if it is a very clever one. First, it does have to be clever, and, second, it has to occur to us at just the right moment and witty.
Though even a witty put-down is unlikely to be our best defence. The problem with the put-down is that it tends to put us on the same pedestal with our insulter, raising him up to our level and bringing us down to his.
This gives him and his insult far too much credibility. The witty put-down should only be used among friends, and only to add to the enjoyment and fun. And it should be followed by friendly gesture and should only be used for humor.
Humor is an especially effective response for three reasons: 1) it dilutes the insult, 2) it brings the audience on his side, 3 )it releases the tension of the situation. Here is an example of the effective use of humor.
Cato the Younger, the Roman statesman and stoic philosopher, was pleading a case when his adversary Lentulus spat in his face. After wiping off the spittle, Cato said, “I will swear to anyone, Lentulus, that people are wrong to say that you cannot use your mouth.”
Sometimes, it might even be appropriate to exaggerate or add to the insult so as to make a mockery of the insulter and, by extension, the insult: ‘Ah, if only had known me better, you would have found greater fault still!’
5. Ignoring the Insult
Ignoring the insulting is easier and, in fact, more powerful.
Response to any situation is in our hands, to mould our minds and to respond appropriately and not to react impulsively.
Question is how to develop one’s thought process in such a way. This requires a sharp mind to quickly identify the reason of insult and the adequate way to respond from the various ways mentioned above.
Nitaai Meditation is the solution to this. We are often encountered with such sudden and unexpected situations where people around us may want to downsize us in order to gain respect in the eyes of others or take revenge and any other reason.
In conclusion, we need to never take such a serious offense at an insult that it affects us. Offense exists not in the insult but in our reaction to it. Our reactions are completely within our control. This can be achieved by practicing the age-old meditative sound therapy of Nitaai Meditation.
The long resonating sound of Nitaaaaaaaaai imbued by the powerful frequencies of nature, makes us much more thoughtful, mindful and aware before we react to an insult. It is unreasonable to expect a bully to be anything but a bully. If we take offense at his or her bad behaviour, we have only our peace and happiness to lose.